I spent last Saturday morning in a wet lab in the large animal hospital. (a Very Very early Halloween Saturday morning) Each organization or club in school holds a "wet lab" in which the members are taught how to do various things we'll need to know someday. They are always different, and sometimes they allow non members to attend for a small fee. The internal medicine wet lab this year (a club to which I do not belong) was palpating cattle, exsanguination, ultrasound and simple cattle diagnostics. I remember hearing the announcement for the lab, as a light came down from heaven and a booming voice said "Kaki, this is your lab...you should go" Ok, so maybe it wasn't that dramatic but I was really really excited. So excited in fact that I begged husband for the $10 it would put us out. And yes, he asked the same question many of you are asking..."You want to PAY money to put your arm up a cow's ass?" well umm... yes! My reply was simple, "Yes, right now I have to pay money to learn how to do it, so that someday people will pay me to do it for them." This apparently made sense to him, and I could see the dollar signs in his eyes start to zing by like a slot machine, he handed me the $10 and told me he didn't really want to know the details.
So, I'll share them with y'all. I know you're just dying to know. The lab was fantastic, held by one of my favorite doctors in the food animal wing, and a new doctor I met that was so fantastic, he reminded me so much of my granddad I wanted to pack him in my luggage and take him home to Thanksgiving. (ok, not really but he was pretty great) Basically, we gloved up and put our entire arm in the cows rectum. Not just for fun mind you, or to violate some unsuspecting cow, there is actual clinical significance for doing this. This procedure is most often done to check and see if a cow is pregnant. From inside the cow you can feel the uterus, descending aorta, kidneys, and a whole slew of other organs. These were Holstein cattle and were pretty used to this procedure. It was pretty easy for us to feel everything we needed to feel because these were "open" cows, or cows that are not currently pregnant. I know it may sound disgusting, in fact I had a friend ask how long it took me to mentally prepare myself for sticking my arm...there. I found this a really odd question. In my world most of us would jump at the opportunity to palpate cattle, not even think twice about it. When she asked this it made me see how odd this whole thing must seem from the outside looking in. I think she was a little sick to her stomach, I need to remember not everyone appreciates my stories--especially while eating.
Overall, the lab was amazing. I did actually feel a cows uterus, and descending aorta which is an incredible feeling. Not something that is easily (or ever for that matter) done on a dog. And again after only seeing dead animals for weeks upon end, it was really nice to have a live one. I learned how to exsanguinate (my fancy new word for "draw blood" that I am intent on using) from a tail vein, and I was good at it. And I ultrasounded a cow's heart--and I found it before the clinician could.
Even after all the hands on stuff my favorite part came from two simple conversations. First, Dr. Grandpa helped me draw blood from the tail vein, he explained it very carefully and then just let me at it. I hit the vein the first try and I was feeling pretty proud of myself. "Good job," he said "you're a natural" It was probably the highlight of my day. And the second conversation was between my favorite clinician and a group of touring high school students and their parents. They just happened to have the fortune (good or bad was their decision) to be walking through the hospital as we were arm deep in cattle. Some were disgusted others intrigued. Not being shy Dr. Pig walks over and invites them in. He explained what we were doing and why. One of the parents asked "These are students? You let the students do this kind of stuff?" I simply would have replied "yeah, this is vet SCHOOL how else do you think we learn how?" Instead Dr. Pig responded with my favorite response this semester "Yes, they are students but we look at them as veterinarians, they can and are allowed to do whatever the Doctors can in this hospital, sometimes they just need guidance. When they graduate, they just get to put doctor in front of their name." I wanted to hug him right there, but I thought it would be inappropriate with a glove covered in cow shit on my arm.
It's days like this that make 4 hour anatomy exams, histology and all the countless hours of sitting in lecture worth it. Knowing that in just 3 1/2 short years I will be officially done, and doing this kind of stuff every day. And just so you know, yes I washed my hands...twice.
P.S. If you click on the title to this blog, there is a fun article about a "new" way to teach us how to do this.
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